You do everything you can to make sure your child has a positive inner voice.
You praise her at all the right times using the right kind of praise. You tell her you love her and are proud of her every day. You nurture her endeavors and give her encouragement along the way.
Despite all that, one day she declares, “I’m no good, so why bother trying?”
Your heart sinks. Could all of your efforts evaporate in a single instance? What went wrong?
When my daughter was born, the one gift I wanted to give her was a strong self-esteem. It is important to me as a woman and a parent. It took me years to build mine. I remember how painful it was during my childhood to never feel relaxed, calm, and confident, to be plagued with self-doubt.
I wanted so much to protect my daughter from the corrosive, universal effects of low self-esteem and a negative inner voice.
I thought I was well-prepared. My son was eleven-years-old when we welcomed my little girl into the world. He’s nineteen now and has always been a relatively calm, happy person.
When problems did arise, we were able to guide him through them. He is a strong, happy individual who is following his dreams and is beginning a business in producing a line of custom electric guitars and bases.
So, when my daughter was born, I thought, we’ve got this. Plus, my husband and I are in the mental health field and we’re older parents. We worked out a lot of our own issues. We know the importance of a positive inner voice and devote ourselves to supporting our children and each other.
As my daughter grows though, so does my concern. [Read more…]