A Fine Parent

A Life Skills Blog Exclusively For Parents

8 Fascinating Insights from Psychology Research That Will Make You a Better Parent

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(This article is part of the Research Insights series. Get free article updates here.)

Psychology Research - Main PicDo your kids sometimes exhibit completely unexpected and irrational behavior?

Heck, do you sometimes do the same?

Psychologists have been studying human behavior and our minds for eons and some of the things they’ve discovered are fascinating.

I love reading about these studies that explain some of our crazy, cooky behavior! And while not all of the studies that I’ve come across are related to parenting, I find that their insights can nevertheless be applied to our day-to-day parenting choices to make us much better parents.

So today, I decided to consolidate some of these studies in one place. I hope you find them as fascinating as I do.

Alright, here we go –

#1 Marshmallow Experiment

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On Unconditional Love, Vulnerability, Being Non-Judgemental and More

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(This article is part of the Wisdom From the Trenches series. Get free article updates here.)

On Unconditional Love, Vulnerability, Being Non-Judgemental and More - Main PosterHave you even met someone who seem like they are very different from you, but before you know it, they touch your life in irrevocable ways and inspire you to be a better version of yourself?

One such person in my life is Lori Deschene.

Lori is the founder of Tiny Buddha, a site I frequent for the touching stories about life, love and healing shared authentically by people just like you and me.

During a particularly rough patch in my life, a mentor suggested I should find a creative outlet.  Knowing my love for Tiny Buddha, he asked “Why don’t you write for Tiny Buddha?”

It was well before I started this blog.

I just laughed.

I’m not a writer. Millions of people read Tiny Buddha. Surely Lori, the founder of the site, is too busy to even consider an article from an amateur like me.

The idea was just absurd.

After much dragging of feet though, I decided to give it a shot anyway.

Just as I expected, Lori turned down my article.

What I didn’t expect however was how gentle she was about the rejection, and how encouraging she was that I should try again.

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101 Fun Things To Do With Kids To Enjoy Everyday Family Life

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(This article is part of the Lighten Up series. Get free article updates here.)

101 Fun Things To Do With Kids To Enjoy Everyday Family Life - IntroductionOn a scale of 1 to 10, how much do you enjoy everyday family life (1 being the least, and 10 the most)?

If you had asked me that question a few years back, I’d have lied. My real answer would have been way too embarrassing to admit.

It’s so easy to get lost in the responsibilities of parenting that we forget to actually enjoy the journey!

We’ve come a long way since. One of the things I’ve learnt along the way is that if you remember to have fun, your day automatically becomes more enjoyable, irrespective of how mundane or stressful it may seem on the outside.

With that in mind, I’ve to put together a monster list of 101 Fun Things To Do With Kids To Enjoy Everyday Family Life. It’s a grab bag of ideas. Pick a few that you think might work for your family and give them a shot. Come back in a few days and pick a few more. And do it until you’re able to look at a perfectly routine, even boring or stressful situation and automatically find joy in it!

OK, we’ve got a lot to cover, so let’s jump right in –  [Read more…]

How to Get Your Kids to Open Up to You About Their Fears and Worries

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(This article is part of the Fear and Worry series. Get free article updates here.)

Getting Kids to Talk -- Expert AdviceDo your kids always tell you what’s going on in their impenetrable little worlds?

My daughter is a certified chatterbox. She’ll tell me about the space-camera-binocular-thingie she is building with Legos until I’m blue in the face from listening. Or about a fancy new restaurant she is going to open. Or the new obstacle course she’s designing.

But ask her what she did in school today, and I get nothing. Zilch. Nada.

She doesn’t get past two sentences about her day before getting sidetracked about something in her imagination that is too fantastic to ignore.

At times, it can be a bit frustrating not knowing what’s going on in her real world.

If you have kids who don’t tell you what they’re up to, for one reason or another, you know that feeling!

I sometimes wonder, if something ever really goes wrong or bothers her, will she tell me? Is there something I can do to make sure that she will?

So, I did what I’ve been doing lately… I reached out to 6 amazing experts in the parenting field and asked them –

How can we get our kids to open up to us about their fears and worries?

The answers they gave me were every bit as insightful and helpful as I’d hoped.

Here’s what I learnt about what we can do to get our kids to open up to us about their fears and worries –

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7 Common Mistakes That Keep Most Parents Unproductive (#3 is the One I’m Most Guilty Of)

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(This article is part of the Productivity series. Get free article updates here.)

(This article is part of the Productivity series. Get free article updates here.)

Let’s face it. No matter how productive we wish and vow to be, as parents, a lot of those good intentions end up down the drains…

Productivity Tips for Parents - Confused MomCooking gets done, but laundry piles up. Kids get dropped off and picked up, but the grocery trip gets nixed. You manage to prepare for that all-important meeting, but just can’t find the time to file that expense report.

I bet you’ve been there at some point or the other.

Have you ever wondered why this happens though? Why is it that we parents seem prone to being unproductive in spite of the desperate need to be as efficient and effective as possible?

Here are some of the common mistakes I believe are the culprits, and some possible fixes. Check it out and see if any of them are bringing you down. And if you have other reasons for your productivity slumps, do let us know in the comments below –

#1 Trying to be a super parent

There are so many times when I’m going about my day that I wonder “What did I do with all my time before having my daughter?”

There seems to be an exponential relationship between the size of your family, and the size of your to-do list – for every new addition to your family, the to-do list multiplies a hundred fold.

Add to that the unreasonable expectations that are placed on parents, either by the world around us, or our own aspirations to be awesome parents, and we trap ourselves in the unattainable goal of becoming super parents. And that doesn’t bode too well for our productivity.

The fix:

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