How is this happening again?

Just a few short moments ago, you were enjoying a calm, relaxing moment together with your child when all of a sudden, out of nowhere, came a full-blown power struggle!

Cue the tears, yelling and hurtful words.

If you’re like most parents, you desperately try to avoid these moments.

They’re not fun.

They’re embarrassing. (Especially with judgmental onlookers questioning your every move.)

But the worst part about power struggles is that they seem to take away way too many of those precious moments you have with your kid (and he’s growing so fast, you don’t want to miss any more of them).

You’ve probably tried all of the standard advice for preventing power struggles…

• You pick your battles
• You give him choices
• You ignore what you can tolerate
• You might even give in every once in awhile because his request isn’t that out of line

But even with these tactics, sometimes avoiding a power struggle just isn’t possible. When he’s acting in a way that’s inappropriate and cannot be ignored, you feel like you’ve got to do something.

But what?

How do you sidestep the argument so that you don’t have to get caught in yet another stressful power struggle, yet remain the type of parent you want to be, one who has expectations and rules, not a doormat who folds at every sign of conflict?

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How financially savvy and responsible are your children? How good is their Money IQ?

Do they understand ATM machines and credit cards don’t actually offer an unlimited supply of money?

Are the words debt, budget, interest, income, and savings like a foreign language to them?

Sadly, according to one article they probably don’t. Researchers found that “73% of American consumers die in debt.” Most of that is credit card debt. People today are controlled by the requirement to pay off debt.

As parents, we have the chance to ensure that our children know how to responsibly control their money instead of living their lives in debt being controlled by money.

We need to be intentional about teaching children financial responsibility. As Christine M. Field says in her book Life Skills for Kids, “Children need to be given the opportunity to make financial decisions as early as possible. It is better to let them learn, experiment, and make mistakes with small sums than to wait…”

I have been blessed to be able to stay home and homeschool my daughters, but I am only able to do that because my husband and I have made it a priority to manage money responsibly. It has made such a difference in our lives we decided it is important to instill financial lessons in our own daughters.

I am definitely still learning on this parenting journey (my daughters are 11 and 10); however, there are a few crucial financial tips that I have discovered over the years.

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I am living with Mount Etna. In tween form.

Any hint of criticism sets off the rumbling. Add an admonishment to the top – BOOM – we have an eruption.

Are you sure you’ve done your homework?

BOOM

You lost your house key?

BOOM

Stop picking on your brother!

BOOM

Are you on your computer? Again?

BOOM

For a while there we were having loud, shouty arguments about everything under the sun. He was prickly and defensive and not a joy to be around.

It would be easy for me to write this off as teenage hormones and tell him he needs to stop being so sensitive. It would be equally easy for me to paint myself as a blameless and suffering supermom, but I know that communication is a two-way street.

But what can I do? I do active listening. I let him fail to develop a growth mindset. I try to back away from the bubbling lava of his hormonal temper. But no matter what I do I seem to trigger more eruptions out of my tween Mt. Etna.

Something was missing. In fact, it was 2 somethings.

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